I met a friend today in SW DC it was like a dream come true. Though I had fun, I can't help but feel bad. I guess cus it was so short lived. i had to cover everything over a months' time. I guess I got irritated but when we sat for coffee at the local starbux I relaxed and swished my venti starbux double shot, and as I spoke, they enjoyed my drink as much as I did lol, glad they liked it. I felt happy for that brief moment. Really I did. I also realized that this person has it beta than me and it won't change. So you just take times like today wit a grain of salt and say that it will be ok. I feel hopeless, the situation is also. As we parted and headed the opposite way, they i/m me to say they saw me across the track. I couldn't help but smile. As my train boarded, I got on and sat at a window seat (sumthin I always do) and waved by to them . It made me instantly sad idk y, I suddenly felt hopeless knowin promises weren't goin to be kept. Then I thought about my friends who have it worse than me,and I just smiled. Though tears where fallin dwn my face. I applause of all my friends and times like today.I've been spaced out ever since, can't shake it. Again another coffee confessional.